No longer a star of our show: Frankly, Kirsty's charleston was a total plank of a dance. 'Kudos' to Brendan for managing shunt and drag even during a non-ballroom number. Surely it's time for Mr Cole to retire?
Bottom Two: I didn't see much of Jamelia's jive as it turns out that my baby finds me singing and dancing the Time Warp simply HILARIOUS, so that's what I spent those 90 seconds doing. And for whoever danced after her. And after that. Etc.
The good: Or, to put it another way, who did wardrobe hate most? (Natalie aside - more on that story later, viewers.) Helen looked like she been papier-mâchéd in loo roll, Kellie proved that 'Sexy Harry Potter' is as appealing a fancy dress concept as 'Sexy Where's Wally', and even Gleb (or 'Glen' as my autocorrect would have it 😂) is officially not handsome enough to rock a greased down nearly-mullet. (Though it turns out waltzes are improved by flying, lady horns and dramatic death scenes.)
The bad: Lovely Carol is still there, which means her level of popularity is so high, she could surely stand for election on a Sell The NHS To Fund PlayStations For Immigrant Terrorists ticket and become PM. What else can explain that utterly terrible rumba getting through? The power of loveliness surely cannot suffice? (Actually, there was a nod to another possible reason for Carol's popularity on her costume - Wardrobe had sewn a glitter skeleton hand on her boob. Many a older gentleman's thoughts visualised, right there.)
You're my favourite: Jeremy! Jeremy! Jeremy! What a performance! Thriller night, indeed. He knows his steps and performs them with enthused relish. Yes, he looks ridiculous, but he also looks MAGNIFICENT!
Tessdressmess: Sexy side Spanx.
Darcey Brussells as Morticia set a few (Mr Cad's) hearts racing.
Pro-dance: If you're going to do a chess concept, it is a TRAVESTY that it's not danced to I Know Him So Well. Two of the worst dances I have ever seen, I think - and I hate to repeat James Jordan, but it does seem odd to use trained ballroom dancers in a contemporary number (Anton does modern - ROFLMFAO). And there was no need to dress Natalie in low quality drag - though it must have taken some doing to make her seem so manly.
The big question: What *did* they promise Nancy to secure that appearance?
Next week: Jamelia's public declaration that she "knows the British public don't like me" should keep her firmly in the bottom two. I just hope it's Lovely Carol that joins her, else the Lovely tag will, through no fault of Lovely Carol's own, start to be in jeopardy. Keeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!
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