Strictly Come Dancing – The Final – Saturday, Dec 18th 2010
“Let’s get ready to Rumba!”
Indeed. The rather naff (and, in the case of Anton du Beke, woefully miscast) opening number by the Strictly Professionals to Survivor’s “Eye of the Tiger” was obviously intended to increase our anticipation for the final Ballroom Blitz, but if even Brendan, the butchest of the male professionals, could look no butcher than Louis Spence throwing a hissy fit at the state of Pineapple Studios’ toilets, then you know that something has been horribly misconceived.
And as for the poor celebrities: forced to wear those Boxer’s capes which simply looked like dressing gowns hastily thrown on to go and answer the front door to the postman. What were the show’s creative team thinking??
The whole Rocky theme was contrived, it seemed, simply to afford Len “Twinkle Toes” Goodman the opportunity to utter that opening line (which was at least genuinely amusing).
Even the delectable Tess “Not-Cat-Deeley” Daly looked like she had been hastily called from the shower and hadn’t had time to finish doing her hair, which seemed to be hanging off her beautiful head in three awful clumps, held together with elastic bands. At least her dress looked suitably glamorous: a bit “Flash Gordon-y” perhaps, but in its white and silver sparkle it did combine the feel of Christmas with the glitz of the Strictly Come Dancing Final.
Our final three teams, Matt and Aliona, Pamela and James and Kara and Artem were to be performing FOUR dances over the course of the evening; including the hotly anticipated Show Dance. The excitement in the studio was palpable and poor old Brucie was stumbling over his lines even more than usual.
First up was Team Mattiona, performing again the Samba they had pulled off with such aplomb in Blackpool. Two things struck me during the obligatory gurn to camera as their names were called out prior to us taking “a look at them in training”: first of all, Matt’s nose seems to have become even more bent across his face – it looked like a banana veering away from his eyebrows towards his cheek. Second of all, I am sure he has had some work done on his teeth which were looking dazzingly white this evening! Anyway, the dance – including that dazzling trio of back flips - didn’t disappoint and the judges’ comments were unanimously favourable. Even Craig had to apologise in advance that his remarks were going to be “all good I’m afraid”. The pair scored a very respectable 38 out of 40, which is pretty much the benchmark for Grand Final week – the flint-hearted Craig tending to hover around the 9 mark with his own scores.
Then we had our first look at the hot favourites, Kara and Artem, who failed to make any attempt at hiding that they are just waiting for the series to finish so that they can get stuck into each other. This despite the fact that Artem seems more – not less – gay since they were outed as a couple-in-waiting some weeks ago. Maybe it’s another reworking of the Showbiz Marriage template in which the husband gives the wife credibility whilst she makes him look hetero? (Mere conjecture on my part, of course). Anyway, Kara referred in her VTR to her burning desire to “lift the glitterball” with Artem and the pair of them wept their way through their interviews like a couple of emotionally incontinent teenagers. Or Ian Beale in any week in Albert Square.
Brucie was beside himself with anticipation of course, and in a moment of toe-curling embarrassment, completely fluffed his gag on the recurring theme of his older man’s yearning for the lithe and extremely lovely Kara. Alas, I cannot remember how the joke was supposed to have gone as I was too busy biting the knuckle of my index finger in horror.
Their dance, the Rumba, was sublime. They scored 39 out of 40 and I thoroughly concurred with Bruno’s description of it as a “glorious” dance of “hypnotic beauty”. My one personal niggle was with their outfits: to me they looked like a couple of office co-workers at the Christmas party who have had too much to drink and decided to loosen up their clothing a bit.
I loved Brucie’s comeback to Craig’s reference to their inclusion of an illegal lift (“I bet you’ve never had one of those!”) and it confirmed to me that Mr Forsythe is still at his best when delivering off-the-cuff one-liners. Why the producers insist on feeding him these awful gags between routines all the time is beyond me.
Finally, the couple in whom I had invested so much (well, £1 to be honest with you): Team PamJam. Apart from them being the pair that I had had the good fortune to be allocated for the Strictly Sweepstake, I have found their “Strictly Journey” to be the most compelling. Being old enough to remember Pamela as the blonde bombshell on “Not the Nine O’Clock News”, it has been a delight to see her back in the Public Eye and dancing so beautifully for someone who is, as so gallantly pointed out by James, older than Matt and Kara combined!
Pam and James gave us their beautiful Viennese Waltz and once again received the perfect score.
The only thing that spoiled it for me was another incidence of the atrocious editing of the songs for their strictly timed routines. At one point – towards the emotional climax of the piece – the singer delivered the extraordinary lyric: “I need your love to me”. Do they think we won’t notice such nonsense?!
Anyway, the dance was performed with exquisite grace and poise and Pammie duly gave the judges her weekly oh-so-humble “thank you’s” and then thanked, as she never forgets to do, all the voters who have been keeping her in.
Now it was time for the Show Dances! (Woo-hoo!)
Remember, “Strictly” fans, the First Rule of Show Dance is…. there are NO rules!
Again, Matt was up first, looking like a spangly farmhand dancing around a couple of spangly bales of hay. I have to say, I thought the lifts and acrobatics were breathtaking, but agreed with the consensus that there was not enough dance content here. Len, to be fair, had spotted “a little bit of cha-cha-cha over there” but, by and large, the feeling was that this was essentially just a showcase for Matt’s gymnastic skills. Despite a controversial 7 from Craig, nobody else dared to drop below a 9 so he scored a decent 34 out of 40 for his efforts.
Kara and Artem (she dressed up like Evil Kenevil; he like a camp Freddy Mercury) then have us their interpretation of Queen’s “Don’t Stop Me Now”. So, Kara can do back flips too; who knew? However, it was clear as soon as she had completed that sequence that something was wrong. Whatever happened to her was not caught on camera, but by the time she was back on her feet she seemed lost and the choreography fell apart for a few beats – Kara appeared to be walking around, Scott Maslen-like, not really knowing where she was. It is credit to her courage and all-round showbiz spirit that, despite being visibly concerned about something, she got herself back into the routine and finished with the same gusto with which she had started the number. It was just unfortunate that by now they were a couple of bars out and so the grand finish (with Kara pulling a lever to shower her and Artem with silvery glittery bits) came after the music had stopped. Oh dear. What was it that had happened? One lift too many? Too challenging a routine? The judges were, rightly I think, sympathetic and gave her a generous score (36 out of 40). I at first thought she might have been worried about popping out of her dress (she nearly did!) but it was clear from the way her right arm was hanging off her like a badly-fitted prosthetic that she had hurt herself in some way. Tess either didn’t notice it or was refusing to allow it to get in the way of her prepared questions (“What are you going to do with your weekends now that “Strictly” has finished?” Phnaar! Phnaar!). I, however, would be watching with some anxiety for the rest of the evening……
Finally in the Show Dance section, came Pamela and James. Pamela, looking beautiful in a flowing blue outfit, danced effortlessly to what was, it must be said, a terrific song choice (“I’ve had the time of my life” from “Dirty Dancing”). It did, of course, set up the expectation that they might (Good Heavens!) actually perform THAT lift so when, inevitably, it didn’t come, we all felt a little cheated. And there was more lyrical butchery in this routine (“You’re the one thing……this could be love”), but it was as good as one would have expected from this couple: more dancey and less showy than the previous two, but it was a nice mix of ballroom skills and had some very clever choregroaphy by James (I’m quoting the judges here – I’m no expert). There was one unfortunate little stumble and a really rather shocking glimpse of Pam’s blue knickers at the ending, but the overall effect was extremely pleasing and they were awarded a creditable 37 out of 40.
So that was Part One over. The scores finely balanced:
PamJam at the top of the Leaderboard on 77, followed by Kartem on 75 and Mattiona on 72.
But, as we were reminded at several points throughout the evening, the judges scores were “for guidance only”. It was still anybody’s to win.
Part Two started with the same breathless excitement that Part One had ended with. Indeed, Brucie sounded almost like he was having a heart attack as he attempted to deliver his opening address to the audience. Tess at least had found the time to sort her hair out and was looking beautiful again – if a little slouchy.
There was no hanging around. It was straight into the first vote-off and tragically (she looked so beautiful and keen to do her Argentine Tango) it was finally Pamela’s time to leave the competition. If I’m honest, it was the right choice and I think everyone knew it was going to happen. The romantic in me likes to think that the judges put her at the top of their scores as they knew she would not win the public vote.
So that was that. A quick trawl through her “Strictly Best Bits” and one last fluttering of her eyelids and PamJam was no more.
Time for the final stretch; Matt and Kara would be dancing to the finish.
Matt started with a Paso Doble to the song, “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood” which had been subjected to an interesting “Mexification” in its musical arrangement. We saw another glimpse of his “competitive streak” during the preceding VTR; in other words, he had another little hissy fit: this time at his own feet! But the dance itself was very commendable, scoring a 35 from the judges. Personally, I’m not sure it contained the requisite Passion, or Duende, but it was good enough and Matt looked very dashing in his black bolero jacket with red shoulder patches. Aliona just looked very, erm, RED!
Kara gave us a beautiful Waltz, looking graceful in a soft, flowing dress. There was a slightly odd note introduced at the beginning of the routine when Artem picked up the hem of the dress as though he was trying to have a peak at what was underneath, but other than my own concern about poor Kara’s arm, the dance was exquisite and scored a 38 from the judging panel.
We then had a reunion of all this season’s contestants (and enjoyed yet more of Tess’s probing interviewing skills: “So, Felicity, have you missed doing the splits?”) while Matt and Kara prepared for their final dances.
So here it was, the final round; just two of them left. As Matt had said in an earlier VTR: “To be the last man standing is amazing, but to be the last one standing… that would be something else” (No – I didn’t think it was a particularly inspired speech either).
But who was it going to be? (Was anyone really in any doubt at this stage??)
Matt went for a quick knock out punch with a fast paced Viennese Waltz (scoring 37 out of 40). Kara countered with an even faster American Smooth, also scoring 37 – despite wincing in agony all the way through and a controversial 7 out of 10 from Craig.
It was all finely poised. We waited with baited breath, pretending not to know who was going to be anointed the new Champion while the “Waiting Music” did its best to crank up the tension……
And the winner is………….
Catherine!! (For it was she who had secured Team Kartem in the Strictly Sweepstake.
My congratulations to her (I believe she has taken her winnings and is enjoying a well-earned victory holiday in France, but she promises that the money “won’t change” her.
Thanks to all of you for taking part in this year’s little flutter and I hope I have managed to do an adequate job filling Catherine’s shoes while she is off spending her fourteen pounds (or the Euro equivalent).
Until next year then.
That is all.
Dan
“Let’s get ready to Rumba!”
Indeed. The rather naff (and, in the case of Anton du Beke, woefully miscast) opening number by the Strictly Professionals to Survivor’s “Eye of the Tiger” was obviously intended to increase our anticipation for the final Ballroom Blitz, but if even Brendan, the butchest of the male professionals, could look no butcher than Louis Spence throwing a hissy fit at the state of Pineapple Studios’ toilets, then you know that something has been horribly misconceived.
And as for the poor celebrities: forced to wear those Boxer’s capes which simply looked like dressing gowns hastily thrown on to go and answer the front door to the postman. What were the show’s creative team thinking??
The whole Rocky theme was contrived, it seemed, simply to afford Len “Twinkle Toes” Goodman the opportunity to utter that opening line (which was at least genuinely amusing).
Even the delectable Tess “Not-Cat-Deeley” Daly looked like she had been hastily called from the shower and hadn’t had time to finish doing her hair, which seemed to be hanging off her beautiful head in three awful clumps, held together with elastic bands. At least her dress looked suitably glamorous: a bit “Flash Gordon-y” perhaps, but in its white and silver sparkle it did combine the feel of Christmas with the glitz of the Strictly Come Dancing Final.
Our final three teams, Matt and Aliona, Pamela and James and Kara and Artem were to be performing FOUR dances over the course of the evening; including the hotly anticipated Show Dance. The excitement in the studio was palpable and poor old Brucie was stumbling over his lines even more than usual.
First up was Team Mattiona, performing again the Samba they had pulled off with such aplomb in Blackpool. Two things struck me during the obligatory gurn to camera as their names were called out prior to us taking “a look at them in training”: first of all, Matt’s nose seems to have become even more bent across his face – it looked like a banana veering away from his eyebrows towards his cheek. Second of all, I am sure he has had some work done on his teeth which were looking dazzingly white this evening! Anyway, the dance – including that dazzling trio of back flips - didn’t disappoint and the judges’ comments were unanimously favourable. Even Craig had to apologise in advance that his remarks were going to be “all good I’m afraid”. The pair scored a very respectable 38 out of 40, which is pretty much the benchmark for Grand Final week – the flint-hearted Craig tending to hover around the 9 mark with his own scores.
Then we had our first look at the hot favourites, Kara and Artem, who failed to make any attempt at hiding that they are just waiting for the series to finish so that they can get stuck into each other. This despite the fact that Artem seems more – not less – gay since they were outed as a couple-in-waiting some weeks ago. Maybe it’s another reworking of the Showbiz Marriage template in which the husband gives the wife credibility whilst she makes him look hetero? (Mere conjecture on my part, of course). Anyway, Kara referred in her VTR to her burning desire to “lift the glitterball” with Artem and the pair of them wept their way through their interviews like a couple of emotionally incontinent teenagers. Or Ian Beale in any week in Albert Square.
Brucie was beside himself with anticipation of course, and in a moment of toe-curling embarrassment, completely fluffed his gag on the recurring theme of his older man’s yearning for the lithe and extremely lovely Kara. Alas, I cannot remember how the joke was supposed to have gone as I was too busy biting the knuckle of my index finger in horror.
Their dance, the Rumba, was sublime. They scored 39 out of 40 and I thoroughly concurred with Bruno’s description of it as a “glorious” dance of “hypnotic beauty”. My one personal niggle was with their outfits: to me they looked like a couple of office co-workers at the Christmas party who have had too much to drink and decided to loosen up their clothing a bit.
I loved Brucie’s comeback to Craig’s reference to their inclusion of an illegal lift (“I bet you’ve never had one of those!”) and it confirmed to me that Mr Forsythe is still at his best when delivering off-the-cuff one-liners. Why the producers insist on feeding him these awful gags between routines all the time is beyond me.
Finally, the couple in whom I had invested so much (well, £1 to be honest with you): Team PamJam. Apart from them being the pair that I had had the good fortune to be allocated for the Strictly Sweepstake, I have found their “Strictly Journey” to be the most compelling. Being old enough to remember Pamela as the blonde bombshell on “Not the Nine O’Clock News”, it has been a delight to see her back in the Public Eye and dancing so beautifully for someone who is, as so gallantly pointed out by James, older than Matt and Kara combined!
Pam and James gave us their beautiful Viennese Waltz and once again received the perfect score.
The only thing that spoiled it for me was another incidence of the atrocious editing of the songs for their strictly timed routines. At one point – towards the emotional climax of the piece – the singer delivered the extraordinary lyric: “I need your love to me”. Do they think we won’t notice such nonsense?!
Anyway, the dance was performed with exquisite grace and poise and Pammie duly gave the judges her weekly oh-so-humble “thank you’s” and then thanked, as she never forgets to do, all the voters who have been keeping her in.
Now it was time for the Show Dances! (Woo-hoo!)
Remember, “Strictly” fans, the First Rule of Show Dance is…. there are NO rules!
Again, Matt was up first, looking like a spangly farmhand dancing around a couple of spangly bales of hay. I have to say, I thought the lifts and acrobatics were breathtaking, but agreed with the consensus that there was not enough dance content here. Len, to be fair, had spotted “a little bit of cha-cha-cha over there” but, by and large, the feeling was that this was essentially just a showcase for Matt’s gymnastic skills. Despite a controversial 7 from Craig, nobody else dared to drop below a 9 so he scored a decent 34 out of 40 for his efforts.
Kara and Artem (she dressed up like Evil Kenevil; he like a camp Freddy Mercury) then have us their interpretation of Queen’s “Don’t Stop Me Now”. So, Kara can do back flips too; who knew? However, it was clear as soon as she had completed that sequence that something was wrong. Whatever happened to her was not caught on camera, but by the time she was back on her feet she seemed lost and the choreography fell apart for a few beats – Kara appeared to be walking around, Scott Maslen-like, not really knowing where she was. It is credit to her courage and all-round showbiz spirit that, despite being visibly concerned about something, she got herself back into the routine and finished with the same gusto with which she had started the number. It was just unfortunate that by now they were a couple of bars out and so the grand finish (with Kara pulling a lever to shower her and Artem with silvery glittery bits) came after the music had stopped. Oh dear. What was it that had happened? One lift too many? Too challenging a routine? The judges were, rightly I think, sympathetic and gave her a generous score (36 out of 40). I at first thought she might have been worried about popping out of her dress (she nearly did!) but it was clear from the way her right arm was hanging off her like a badly-fitted prosthetic that she had hurt herself in some way. Tess either didn’t notice it or was refusing to allow it to get in the way of her prepared questions (“What are you going to do with your weekends now that “Strictly” has finished?” Phnaar! Phnaar!). I, however, would be watching with some anxiety for the rest of the evening……
Finally in the Show Dance section, came Pamela and James. Pamela, looking beautiful in a flowing blue outfit, danced effortlessly to what was, it must be said, a terrific song choice (“I’ve had the time of my life” from “Dirty Dancing”). It did, of course, set up the expectation that they might (Good Heavens!) actually perform THAT lift so when, inevitably, it didn’t come, we all felt a little cheated. And there was more lyrical butchery in this routine (“You’re the one thing……this could be love”), but it was as good as one would have expected from this couple: more dancey and less showy than the previous two, but it was a nice mix of ballroom skills and had some very clever choregroaphy by James (I’m quoting the judges here – I’m no expert). There was one unfortunate little stumble and a really rather shocking glimpse of Pam’s blue knickers at the ending, but the overall effect was extremely pleasing and they were awarded a creditable 37 out of 40.
So that was Part One over. The scores finely balanced:
PamJam at the top of the Leaderboard on 77, followed by Kartem on 75 and Mattiona on 72.
But, as we were reminded at several points throughout the evening, the judges scores were “for guidance only”. It was still anybody’s to win.
Part Two started with the same breathless excitement that Part One had ended with. Indeed, Brucie sounded almost like he was having a heart attack as he attempted to deliver his opening address to the audience. Tess at least had found the time to sort her hair out and was looking beautiful again – if a little slouchy.
There was no hanging around. It was straight into the first vote-off and tragically (she looked so beautiful and keen to do her Argentine Tango) it was finally Pamela’s time to leave the competition. If I’m honest, it was the right choice and I think everyone knew it was going to happen. The romantic in me likes to think that the judges put her at the top of their scores as they knew she would not win the public vote.
So that was that. A quick trawl through her “Strictly Best Bits” and one last fluttering of her eyelids and PamJam was no more.
Time for the final stretch; Matt and Kara would be dancing to the finish.
Matt started with a Paso Doble to the song, “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood” which had been subjected to an interesting “Mexification” in its musical arrangement. We saw another glimpse of his “competitive streak” during the preceding VTR; in other words, he had another little hissy fit: this time at his own feet! But the dance itself was very commendable, scoring a 35 from the judges. Personally, I’m not sure it contained the requisite Passion, or Duende, but it was good enough and Matt looked very dashing in his black bolero jacket with red shoulder patches. Aliona just looked very, erm, RED!
Kara gave us a beautiful Waltz, looking graceful in a soft, flowing dress. There was a slightly odd note introduced at the beginning of the routine when Artem picked up the hem of the dress as though he was trying to have a peak at what was underneath, but other than my own concern about poor Kara’s arm, the dance was exquisite and scored a 38 from the judging panel.
We then had a reunion of all this season’s contestants (and enjoyed yet more of Tess’s probing interviewing skills: “So, Felicity, have you missed doing the splits?”) while Matt and Kara prepared for their final dances.
So here it was, the final round; just two of them left. As Matt had said in an earlier VTR: “To be the last man standing is amazing, but to be the last one standing… that would be something else” (No – I didn’t think it was a particularly inspired speech either).
But who was it going to be? (Was anyone really in any doubt at this stage??)
Matt went for a quick knock out punch with a fast paced Viennese Waltz (scoring 37 out of 40). Kara countered with an even faster American Smooth, also scoring 37 – despite wincing in agony all the way through and a controversial 7 out of 10 from Craig.
It was all finely poised. We waited with baited breath, pretending not to know who was going to be anointed the new Champion while the “Waiting Music” did its best to crank up the tension……
And the winner is………….
Catherine!! (For it was she who had secured Team Kartem in the Strictly Sweepstake.
My congratulations to her (I believe she has taken her winnings and is enjoying a well-earned victory holiday in France, but she promises that the money “won’t change” her.
Thanks to all of you for taking part in this year’s little flutter and I hope I have managed to do an adequate job filling Catherine’s shoes while she is off spending her fourteen pounds (or the Euro equivalent).
Until next year then.
That is all.
Dan